Mornings

My wife often asks me how I get the boys out in the morning so efficiently. While I do not generally consider myself an organized person, I have to admit the routine has been surprisingly effective and efficient. The boys have even commented on how quickly I get them out because they get to Playcenter early and can play longer with their friends.
While it is hard to put my finger on what I do, or compare it to what she does, I have attempted to break it down.
Fundamentally, we just need to get up, get dressed, brush teeth, brush hair, have breakfast, grab lunch boxes, put on coats, get in the car, fasten seatbelts and drive six blocks.

6:00
My alarm goes off, I hit snooze, turn on news, and fall back asleep for fifteen minutes.
6:15
Get up, head to the shower.
6:45
Come out of the shower; yell to boys to get them awake. Tell them we are leaving at 7:20.
7:00
Fully dressed, go to the boy's rooms and get them up. Tell them to get dressed, because we leave in twenty minutes, head downstairs.
7:05
Get lunches out of fridge, yell to the boys, and start making breakfast for myself.
7:10
Go back upstairs, check on progress of boys. Remind them to brush their teeth before they come down. Explain they only have ten minutes.
7:12
Run up stairs, bring boys downstairs, and chastise them for not brushing their teeth, which they deny, until I threaten the fresh-bresh test.
7:15
Get boys to table, force feed them cereal and a breakfast bar while I drink my milk and eat heaping teaspoons of yogurt.
7:16
Find boy's shoes while boys eat a cup of cereal with no milk and find the brush for their hair, which is sticking up in many different directions
7:17
Fight the brush through the boy’s hair, spray water on their head to calm it down, force shoes on their feet and throw coats at them, still looking for the brush.
7:18
Zip up coats, wipe food that is falling from their faces while simultaneously putting their backpacks on, avoiding the dripping water coming from their heads.
7:19
Force glove on their hands and help zip lunches into backpacks, still avoiding the water from their heads.
7:20
Abandon hair brushing and put wool hats over the boy’s wet, moppy heads.
7:21
Climb in car, tell boys to buckle up while we are on the road, which becomes a moot point since they are not even in their seats and at this point we are two blocks from the school.
7:22
Pull into school’s circular drive, screech to a halt in the fire lane, park illegally, run out of car with the boys, which is quick because the boys never put their seat belts on, and head straight for school’s side door.
7:23

Check boys into Playcenter, give quick hugs to the boys who are still wearing their jackets and wool hats, go out the emergency exit which is closer to the car the car and sprint to car, drive to work.